Today was a very good day indeed! I overcame nerves, led a workshop, participated in meetings, and attended two wonderful events. I even managed to get to my yoga class. The best part of this very good day was that my mind didn’t interfere with my confidence and joy.
This is not always the case.
Sometimes my mind spins into crazy worry and doubt about everything I do and say. This happened a few weeks ago – a huge fog of the cries and the sads clung around me like some bad smell for the entire long November long weekend and drifted into back-to-work-Monday. Part of this unjoyous experience included large feelings of unworthiness springing from deep within my spirit.
To get past these bad feelings I found making keys helpful. But mostly what helped was getting back to work and sensing all the health and good spirits of my colleagues. They don’t know it but their happiness helped to disperse the fog around me and bring me back to a better self.
Here are the keys I made on that distraught weekend:
Key 748 has a large dark button on the one side that came from a very favourite but no longer in good shape shirt. The button actually has a lace pattern on it that I could not get to show up in the photo no matter how many angles I tried.
The small silver centre on the other side of Key 748 is a “Neon Buddha” marker from that now snipped into cleaning rags favourite shirt. I had quite a time removing the cloth this metal part was riveted through. At one point I even tried burning out the material (that didn’t work but the metal marker sure got hot – luckily for me I was at the kitchen sink and some cooking tongs were handy).
Eventually I went at the piece hard with some needle nosed pliers. I managed to mangle off the back part of the rivet and remove the cloth…but I caught my finger in the process:
This ouch photo was taken after a week and half of healing. My finger didn’t hurt past the initial pinching – just left a reminder of a dumb action in the midst of a bad time.
Key 749 is made with some beautiful jewelry that was recently gifted to me.
The end piece is the inside of a razor blade scraper my husband found on the road a few weeks ago. The metal got a bit bent up when I was removing it but I think it looks pretty great as part of a key!
Key 750 is the mangled outside of that same razor blade scraper. The crazy metal on the bottom is another road treasure my husband found for me. I bent that metal a little bit to fit on the key but for the most part that is what it looked like when I got it.
Hmm…Key 748 – delicate beautiful pattern hidden in blackness…Key 749 – treasures hidden inside and sparkles from others…Key 750 – really crazy, unique, interesting – ripped up pieces that yielded something lovely in Key 749. Interesting to take another look at these keys with a lighter spirit.